To Those I've Offended

Speaking Truth Isn’t an Attack. It’s a Rescue Call.

Speaking up about abuse and harmful doctrine in the 2x2 church has come with costs. Most of you haven’t said anything directly to me—but I know how this works. I was once a part of this system. The reactions are both subtle and overt. Quiet but obvious.

You avoid eye contact. You cut off communication. You stop including me. You gossip about me and my family. You pretend not to notice the changes in me. Some of you may even hate me—or at the very least, strongly dislike me.

You assume my husband doesn’t feel the way I do—that he’s a victim of all of my “crazy.” But that’s not true. We make decisions together, and he feels just as strongly about it as I do. If you’re curious, just ask him.

And I, in turn, pretend like I don’t notice all of this. But I do.

In many ways, I get it. I’ve hurt you deeply. You see my words as an attack on your belief system and the faith you hold dear.

And for that, I am sorry. I never set out to hurt you, because I would never want to hurt you. But this isn’t about you personally. It’s about something much bigger than any one of us.

I am not sorry for speaking the honest truth. Because the real truth matters—even when it hurts, it hurts you to hear it, and it has hurt me to say it. I’ve said out loud the things that we’ve been told to keep quiet.

Before I started using my voice and sharing my thoughts, I counted the cost. My husband and I knew there would be a cost to leaving the church, too. But staying silent would have cost us our integrity—and our conscience. We couldn’t live with that, and we still can’t.

Here’s how I see it: if a house is burning down and I’ve escaped and you’re still stuck inside, I wouldn’t just stand by and hope you make it out. I’d call out to you, I’d do everything I could to try to help you find a way out, too. And that’s why I speak. Even if you disagree with me, it comes from the heart.

Do I sometimes get angry and resentful about the whole thing? Yes, I’m human, and there have been some pretty horrific things happening in the 2x2 church. But ultimately, I care about everyone still stuck in the bondage of a system that manipulates and controls in subtle, spiritual ways.

I’ve seen the damage this church does firsthand. I’ve sat with victim survivors as all they could do was weep from all of the pain of not being believed or supported—but rather shunned. This isn’t about a few bad apples, it’s about systemic failure to follow the teachings of Christ—and the effects have perpetuated harm for over 100 years. We’re just only hearing about it now.

I know you don’t think you’re in bondage, in an unhealthy system, or being manipulated. I didn’t either, for a long time. But all of the signs are there—if you’re willing to take the painful step of opening your eyes and being honest with yourself, and with God. Love is stronger than fear. Our faithful God will let us know if something isn’t right—we just have to be willing to let go of our own comfort.

My intentions aren’t evil or out of bitterness. They come from love. You may not see that now. But you once knew me. You saw my heart. And I want you to know—I’m still me.

Maybe the damage is done. Maybe our relationships can’t be repaired. But if the day ever comes when your eyes open and your heart aches with the weight of disillusionment—know this:

I’ll still be waiting here with open arms.